Opinions

Stop spoiling your children

The stories of rebellious children throwing tantrums at schools and acting out against their teachers and other authority figures have become commonplace. We have grown accustomed to speaking about children’s rights and how they should be treated with a pair of golden gloves. As time progressed we seemed to forget about the importance of discipline and raising our children to become valuable citizens.

One of the repercussions is that children are losing their way, extending this trend into adulthood where they live lesser lives, never achieving their potential. The problem arises from the fact that children have now gotten used to getting whatever they want, whenever they please. A direct result of a society thriving on immediate gratification with little patience to wait. This is coupled with the fact that parents feel guilty that they do not spend enough time with their children and try to compensate for this shortcoming by buying them anything they want.

Children are influenced to behave problematically when they are disciplined or not given something they want. In this article, we discuss some of the traits that can raise children in a spoiled manner.

Giving in to each request

Our busy lifestyle and schedules make a child tantrum or argument the last thing we look forward to after a hard day’s work. Giving in to whatever request your kid makes is the easiest way out to achieve some peace and quiet. In other times you may be driven by the desire of keeping your child happy. Giving them whatever they want will set an unrealistic expectation that they can get whatever they want from anyone, including yourself. This makes it hard for the child as a grown-up where he will need to develop relationships with other people, where give and take is the expected norm. If it is all about “me, me” when the child becomes a teenager or even an adult, will find it difficult to develop meaningful relationships. Apart from all this, it also sets an unrealistic expectation that you can get whatever you please just by crying and whining.

Not delivering

If parents make statements they do not keep, such as threatening with punishment and up never punishing, this will transmit the message that authority should not be respected since it does not deliver on its promises. This will make parents appear less authoritative and their advice or instructions would be taken lightly.

Your child is always right

It is part of a child’s learning process to identify and rectify areas where he is wrong. It is the responsibility of parents to make sure that their child is aware of any mistakes he has made and that appropriate action is taken. It is highly detrimental for the long-term development of a child to believe that he is always right.

Everything’s going to be all right

Yes eventually everything solves itself out, however, children from a young age should start learning to make their effort in order to grow strong. Whilst solving your children’s problems may be the natural instinct as a protective parent, this may have long-term consequences. This can raise a generation of people who take their problems for granted with the belief that they will be solved by someone else, therefore creating a sense of dependence on others.

A parent’s job is not easy. Managing a work life, career and children may be too strenuous at times. With that said, today’s parents have a key role in contributing to a generation of worthy citizens, who in turn can create a better society.

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